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"Just pain and blood and razor burn": The First Month of Weckoning has come and passed; An Analysis of Gore and Announcement of Winner(s)

The Days of Weckoning have concluded; August brought 31 days of danger, blood, bitching and moaning, optimism, and an overwhelming sense of accomplishment (typically in that order) and we are delighted to announce the results, but first, a few impressions:

Learning the Ways of the Weck is challenging:

Learning the weck is a challenge u/Priusaurus

this thing fucking SUCKS. It just skips all over my face. A+ lather for my vector and this thing just doesn’t work. Worst shave of my life. u/souleater7173

it is a test of will

Already hating this razor and we’ve barely started. Was really hoping it would take a week or two before despair, but alas. u/souleater7173*

Only 5 more scrapes to go. u/OnionMiasma

it is dangerous:

I swear the Weck is just a medieval torture device. u/OnionMiasma

I still cut myself every shave, it’s very annoying and painful, but it’s better than the night I was ready to give up. u/putneycj

Cuts: 3 (Running total: 31) u/OnionMiasma

it is unforgiving:

Day 2 and I’m my face is absolutely on fire from the second day with the Sextoblade. u/jwoods23

Wow, what happened to your face!? u/putneycj's offspring

I am not enjoying this hair shaper at all. Literally 0%. In fact, I actively dislike it. Will I continue with it tomorrow? I doubt it. I’m not quitting tonight. I don’t have to quit tonight, I already shaved with this piece of garbage. u/putneycj

Today’s shave felt great. Then I got to the splash and there was so much feedback. So many micro nicks on my chin from the ATG. I think I’m gonna have one of those weird razor burn hickeys again tomorrow. u/souleater7173

Corner bit me hard on my first pass. So much blood. u/putneycj

and it is satisfying:

As much as I’ve bitched this month about the Weck I’ve really enjoyed having the challenge of it! u/jwoods23

In this moment, I realized that the battles fought, the routines embraced, and the lessons learned have all led me to this point. u/Absenth

Surprisingly decent shave today u/souleater7173

Insert section here about learning a lot, blah blah. u/putneycj

The Results

14 daring souls embarked on the adventure of Austere Weckoning and 12 brave competitors made it through the ordeal with all 31 days djudged as valid by the GEM Djustice Eld, Semaj "the Gavel" 3000, or myself.

The distinguished new members of the Weckonista faction are:

  1. u/jwoods23
  2. u/putneycj
  3. u/Absenth
  4. u/Environmental-Gap380
  5. u/Eructate
  6. u/gcgallant
  7. u/Old_Hiker
  8. u/OnionMiasma
  9. u/Priusaurus
  10. u/souleater7173
  11. u/EldrormR (not eligible for GC)
  12. u/djundjila (not eligible for GC)

All these Masters of the Weck are now eligible to proudly display the 🎩Weckonista🧐 flair, but there can only be one winner of the main prize in this Weckstravaganza, and the lucky individual is 🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁 u/OnionMiasma!

To assuage conspiracy-minded folks; the random drawing was done using the fair and reproducible PIF winner evaluation script I wrote during LatherBot's sabbatical to choose among candidates in a non-sus manner.

Here's the invocation. Verify it 😉

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