Love to be dragged into a plane of eternal torment and subjected to the most nightmarish cruelty my patron can devise, because I failed to fulfill condition XXVI.a.243-0.1 in the infernal contract.
Love to have a creature of mad whimsy show up to cause sheer bedlam at the worst possible moment, because I stumbled in a grove half-starved and ate fruit from the wrong Fae Lord's magical bush a lifetime ago.
Love to be forever trapped under the unblinking eye of the Divine Surveillance State with an angel's merciless glare boring holes into the back of my neck because my great-great-great-grandfather pledged himself to the seventh generation as part of the Glorious Crusade of the Most Righteous High One.
Warlocks having so much fun right now... weee... :-(