what would be a funny thing to teach my 5 y/o niece?
what would be a funny thing to teach my 5 y/o niece?
I'm visiting extended family for the first time in a long time, and one of my nieces has reached the impressionable age where she keeps mimicking things that she sees me do. what's a really funny but fairly harmless thing I should teach her to do?
It'd be hilarious if you taught her how to code Fortran.
138 2 ReplyFlicking your cheek just right to make the water drop noise
89 0 ReplyOn a vacation when I was a teenager I taught my younger sibling the "SYN/ACK" game.
They still remember the TCP stack handshake protocol including resets and acks years later.
67 1 ReplyMy niece and nephew loved the “this guy” gag. What’s got two thumbs and thinks you’re the coolest? THIS GUY! and point to yourself with your thumbs.
65 0 ReplyTeach her to order something off a foreign-language menu, invite the family out to dinner, and see if she can place her order fluently.
Doing the "Five year old white girl shocks waitress by ordering Orange Chicken in perfect Mandarian" bit IRL would be pretty funny and adorable.
54 0 ReplyI've thought my niece that policemen go "oink oink" and that pigs go "You have the right to remain silent!"
57 7 ReplyLockpicking
Using Linux
Media piracy
Feeding the homeless
Wheatpasting / graffiti
Political theory
Shoplifting from corporate chains
First Aid
Legal observation
Black bloc tactics
Guerilla gardening
Spotting plainclothes cops / informants
Dialectical Materialism
51 5 Reply47 1 Reply- Beatboxing. "Boots and cats and boots and cats"-style.
- The pulling your thumb off trick.
- The Macarena.
- "The Game". ("You just lost The Game.")
- Chopsticks on the piano/keyboard/toy xylophone/etc.
- "The Name Game."
46 1 ReplyA buddy of mine taught his 5 yr old daughter to tell people "One time, at band camp...I stuck a flute in my..." *long pause* "nose".
And he gets joy remembering all of the people go wide-eyed waiting for that next word out of her mouth.
45 3 Reply"Guess what?"
"What?"
"CHICKEN BUTT!"
39 1 ReplyTeach her how she can insert "apparently" into every statement.
38 0 ReplyIf she's the right age, Teach her The Game. It's a brain virus game.
Rule number 1 of The Game, you can not think about The Game. When you think about The Game you lose.
Rule number 2, when you think of The Game you have to say that you've lost The Game. Ideally loudly and publicly.
Rule number 3, after losing the game you get 30 minutes grace period to stop thinking about it before The Game starts again.
Rule number 4, once you have learned about the game you may either play the game or cheat.
36 1 ReplyI taught my niece to say "I can't work like this!". That was fun!
34 0 ReplyI taught my kid to say "mom drinks beer for breakfast" as soon as she could talk. Wasn't that popular with the family xD
36 3 ReplyArm pit farts
32 1 ReplyHow to tie her shoes the instant/quick way. She'll be the coolest kid to all her peers and even amaze other parents who witness it...
https://youtu.be/Q5qZpQe_4EA?si=6fPhLyHs5BwJoaoA
(I have no affiliation with that channel it was just the first thing that came up when I searched)
30 0 ReplyEnd every other sentence with ~ nya ~
26 2 ReplyThe drums.
Or a less chaotic-evil suggestion, that water-drop sound made by flicking your cheek.
21 1 ReplyThe Macarena and/or the YMCA dance, it's fun for kids to do over and over but harmless.
20 1 ReplyI have had pretty good luck with doing
High five Up high Down low Too slow
My nephew would just let me do it forever, always trying to beat me on the too slow bit.
16 0 Replyi decided to let her watch Smackdown with me. we'll see what she picks up as a surprise for mom & dad
16 1 ReplyI taught my 18 month year old niece the sound a dinosaur makes. ROOOOOOOAAAR
15 0 ReplyGive her some unconventional future career ideas. Non-edgy ones, of course. I think it would be pretty funny if after a visit from an uncle your kid was talking about sailing knots or embalming procedures or something.
14 0 ReplyAssembly
13 0 ReplyTeach her to take a drink and then smack her lips and say, “ahhh”.
14 1 ReplyPull my finger.
14 1 ReplyPoker. And proper bluffing.
13 1 ReplyJuggling ? beginning with two balls is fairly easy and is a slippery gateway to more balls
12 0 ReplyDo something that will confuse her parents a ton. Like tell her that every time she wants something, she has to touch her nose three times then say the thing. Demonstrate it a lot to drill it in.
taps nose three times... COOKIES
12 0 ReplyThat it's pronounced heliclopter and not helicopter.
14 2 ReplyWe got my niece to speak a little Klingon.
10 0 ReplyGang signs.
11 1 ReplyDad jokes or anti jokes maybe? Math formulas? A foreign language?
9 0 ReplyPlay chess.
9 0 ReplyTell her a fun fact, in your best science teacher tone. It takes one billion microseconds to get to one second. Hopefully she can run with this and ask more questions.
9 0 ReplyUsing capitals
10 2 ReplyHow to disco.
8 0 ReplyTeach her to say "I was born on a pirate ship"
Once she's able to say it properly, tell her to open her mouth with a finger at each corner and say the phrase again. Get her to shout it out
Then tell her to show her new trick to mom and dad.
10 3 ReplyThat white cows make milk for white coffee and black cows make milk for black coffee.
10 3 ReplyWhat I like to do with kids that age is cartwheels. One hand, two hands, one foot, two feet.
Good time to introduce them to interesting foods too.
Spitting watermelon seeds really far is also fun.
The macarena.
7 0 ReplyIf you know how, teach her how to whistle real high using the fingers on top of the tongue. One way is by making an O with the thumb and the index finger, bending/rolling your tongue backwards a bit and pressing your fingers against it.
6 0 ReplyGreasy, grimy gopher guts
Mutilated monkey meat
Dirty little birdy feet
Floatin in snake eyeballsToo
Bad
I
Forgot
My
Spoon
But I got my straaaaaawwwwww. sluuuuurp
7 1 ReplyJuggling?
6 0 ReplyDo the burp trick by swallowing air, and then giggle uncontrollably.
6 0 Replygentoo
5 1 Replyhttps://youtu.be/F5bW8H-kNZs?si=g6cdvXnLXHRLzBXJ
Okay don't actually do this
5 1 ReplyImpressions. Cartoon characters are best
3 0 ReplyTeach her about Poseidon's Kiss.
3 0 ReplyMake her chant for trump or biden depending on which will piss the elders off more.
4 1 ReplyTaught her to walk with her hands put behind like an old man https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BOTUuz_t7A
2 0 ReplySay “on skib a dee” to any young kid. They love it.
3 1 ReplyMake a fist stick up your pinky, put your mouth next to your thumb puff out your cheeks, and repeat the word "girl".
2 4 Replyskibidi toilet
3 6 Reply