My mother was mostly a stranger growing up. I don't know exactly how the arrangement came about, but I was my father's child. She kept her distance and took to my sibling instead. She worked weekends when I was younger so I saw her comparatively little, and by the time I was a teenager my father's abuse had long since driven her into drink and depression. I had little idea what she liked, what her hobbies were or what her life was like before me.
I left in my late teens but moved back in with her in my early 20's. They had divorced just before I left, and she hadn't been coping with it very well. I hadn't coped well with life either. Those were some hard years at first. Both traumatized and stranded. I've gotten to know her very well since then. Frankly, too much. She's no saint, but she's well intentioned and I've come to love her even if I didn't as a child.
My father I always knew. He's not exactly hard to understand, just another emotionally stunted and cowardly little man. We were only ever a tool for him - to win approval from his parents, and to provide one small space where he could inflict his control. I know every little thing he likes because those were the only things that were allowed to matter. He tried desperately to make me become like him. I am very glad I am not.
I disagree with most of this thread. Microsoft must maintain market share at all costs, any additional monetization from tracking or ad revenue is a very distant third to that. It lives based on being the default option. A new launch will bring in new users and help keep existing ones, but it must be seen as successful. So Microsoft needs to port as many of it's current users over as possible.
Second I think is pruning the nightmare of legacy support. A "new" operating system lets you set a more modern baseline and tell people to buy new hardware in a much more user intelligible way. No having to explain why Windows 7 no longer works on someone's 2007 laptop that came with it, or come up with a maze of partial support and having to work out what the last usable update was.
The editor is truly amazing. It has powerful scripting engine and was easy to use. One of my potentially hot takes is it was so much better than using Morrowind's construction kit. The game used to be full of custom persistent world servers which were sort of MMO-lite, big communities that were often way more roleplay based and free of the time wasting, money sucking bullshit of actual MMOs. Sadly, one of those ephemeral game moments that cannot be replayed.
And yeah, Deekin comes in the Shadows of Undrentide expansion and remains a companion through Horde of the Underdark. Honestly, if you like Deekin and haven't played Undrentide I'd recommend giving it ago. It's a refreshingly small scale adventure - it's more like the CRPG equivalent of a short paperback fantasy novel than a grand epic. It also makes the wise decision of not being a continuation of the original campaign.
I loved NWN when it came out but it's appeal was rooted in the multiplayer and custom content. It had an amazing community with great tools to support it. You can still find servers for it but they're not worth it, it's the bastion of people who haven't moved on in 20 years.
The single player was pretty bland. Shadows of Undrentide is a genuinely fun adventure, and I'll love Deekin (a kobold companion) forever, but the original campaign is a slapped together proof of concept and Hordes of the Underdark is a mess that's only really notable for being a high level adventure.
Some of the premium modules were praised but I'd moved on to persistent world servers then other games long before they were released.
I've been looking for rentals lately. Every inspection has dozens upon dozens of people show up. Rental vacancies are at a tiny fraction of a percent. No landlord will take someone if the rent will cost more than 30% of their income. To qualify for a studio apartment it takes almost double the median wage.
I hate it so much. I've budgeted so that I know I can afford these places on my income, I have a significant pile of savings and a stable job. I have been looking for a place for six months and been rejected from them all.
I've given up. Even if I could get a place it'd be cheaper to pay a fucking mortgage.
I've been very candid about most aspect of my life at different times on the internet. Health, sex, poverty, abuse, you name it. Some of it while extremely mentally unwell.
But would would actually be the worst is if anyone found the fan fiction I wrote when I was like 13.
That's interesting, when I learned to touch type in school we weren't taught to use the right shift. Likely an oversight rather than intentional, but I just use my pinky to hit the left shift while using the left hand side of the keyboard.
It might be worth looking for a family practitioner (that's the American term for a general doctor right?) that advertises experience with mental health. Queer friendly and poor (and the many euphemisms they use) assistance is also a good sign. Talk about how your disability is effecting your mental health, ask if they have recommendations for both.
The reason I recommend this is you're looking for people with empathy. Bureaucracies are made of people first and foremost, checking the right boxes is second to having someone who will make sure the right box gets checked. People who deal with mental health, queerness and poverty are also far more likely to have the experience to point you in the right direction with government services. They probably wont be the end of your journey but they'll be a good guide.
First, you'll want to look into government disability support. The specifics will vary wildly depending where you are, but it's probably your most useful resource. For me, along with the money, they had tailored support for finding work I could do.
They ended up finding me a part time, WFH call center job. There were incentives for the employer to take me because of my disability and assistance (including financial) for setting me up for it. It was still extremely hard but the disability support checked in on me regularly to help me through it.
Before that, there are plenty of ways to make money online. Too many to list. If you've got the basic skills, the equipment and you're still able to function enough it's worth trying.
There is also going to be a variety of various charity and government support programs for people with disabilities, low income earners, etc. with the specifics depending on where you are. The harsh reality is surviving will mean learning to swallow your pride and enduring shame. Don't just look for "disability" support, take anything you might be applicable for. Make sure to look through every level of government you might come under as they aren't unified and can be difficult to find.
Community groups can be an invaluable resource. If there are ones that might apply to you - whether it be around ethnicity, sexuality, religion, whatever - you can find a wealth of assistance. At the very least they're going to have some free food.
If you aren't going to find a new job, document any inappropriate behavior. Talk to the other women and get them onboard. Let them know who he is. It wont take much to have him out on his ass if he does anything. Bring up his conviction when you report misconduct as well.
There are plenty of jobs he can work that aren't with the best friend of his victim.
My favourite bit on drow related lore is from 2E. Non-drow followers of Eilistraee would do black face and travel the world as part of an effort to show drow could be peaceful. There is something hilarious to me about how well intentioned the author seems to be but completely oblivious to what it looks like.
Being a Dragon Age: Origins fanatic and long time CRPG lover, I was disappointed by the downgrades but still mostly enjoyed Dragon Age II at the time. Once I got over it not being Origins II, my only big gripe was towards the end I found the copy pasted levels nauseating.
I had this ex who was deep into D&D and really keen on similar movies to The Princess Bride from the same era, but hadn't seen it. I suggested it for a movie night while we were sharing movies that were a big part of our childhood and got "it looks stupid, I'm not watching that". Unironically might have been the straw that broke the back of that relationship, I ended things not long after.
Yeah this one of those movies that is like designed to be memory holed. I remember it being the subject of a bad movie night with friends, but all I remember is Jeremy Irons hamming it the fuck up. Literally nothing else about the movie.
soli @ solitaire @infosec.pub Posts 1Comments 244Joined 2 yr. ago
My mother was mostly a stranger growing up. I don't know exactly how the arrangement came about, but I was my father's child. She kept her distance and took to my sibling instead. She worked weekends when I was younger so I saw her comparatively little, and by the time I was a teenager my father's abuse had long since driven her into drink and depression. I had little idea what she liked, what her hobbies were or what her life was like before me.
I left in my late teens but moved back in with her in my early 20's. They had divorced just before I left, and she hadn't been coping with it very well. I hadn't coped well with life either. Those were some hard years at first. Both traumatized and stranded. I've gotten to know her very well since then. Frankly, too much. She's no saint, but she's well intentioned and I've come to love her even if I didn't as a child.
My father I always knew. He's not exactly hard to understand, just another emotionally stunted and cowardly little man. We were only ever a tool for him - to win approval from his parents, and to provide one small space where he could inflict his control. I know every little thing he likes because those were the only things that were allowed to matter. He tried desperately to make me become like him. I am very glad I am not.