14/15.... I guess I understand that these things might not be common knowledge, but scoring less than 10 is more troubleling than I originally thought the article was.
This is hard. It does sound like there is a bit of a wealth imbalance.
First, a defense of you partner. When someone is poor, or has grown up with poverty, seeing someone who has money but doesn't spend it can be difficult. Sometimes this can be due to monetary education as a child, but generally those who do not gain financial literacy early in life struggle with understanding money and how it works until they do gain financial literacy.
It sounds as if you have had some financial training, probably given to you by your parents. Having things like an emergency fund, particularly at your age, is exceptionally rare.
If your partner hasn't had a similar experience, it can be extremely painful to them to see you 'have money', while they may feel like they struggle daily.
There is a reason most lottery winners who are poor typically lose all the money they win in a matter of years... Even hundreds of millions of dollars can disappear on them in often as little as 7 years. Understanding the psychology of how poverty finance works can help in these situations.
Most people, without financial literacy training, will immediately spend all of the money they have. This behavior is taught to them at a very young age. The reason is that money you don't have can't be taken from you. Debt is essentially forever and infinite. Liquid capital is extremely limited and will disappear if not used immediately. Most poor people will immediately spend all of their money on themselves, their family and their friends without thought. This desire to spend is not driven by greed, but instead by love. Everyone wants their friends and family to have the things they desire. Since money is temporary, spend it when it is available.
The psychology of not spending money is literally only a privilege of those who have some financial freedom.
From this lens, seeing a person you are with not spending their money on you is painful.
This isn't to say that is exactly what is happening, but it sounds possible.
What does sound true is that you are already on guard. This on guard feeling is the part that is hard to escape... And frankly it can be difficult to ever move past this.
To be clear, this is a you problem.
That isn't too say that you are wrong. But the problem is yours to figure out. Either you figure out if you think he is taking advantage of you or he isn't.
This is going to be a you thing to work out. You should ask him questions to figure out what he is doing and how he feels. You need to figure out how you feel.
He can afford but unwilling to pay half. Huge red flag.
He cannot afford to pay half.
You cannot afford to pay half.
You can afford to pay half but cannot afford all.
You can afford to pay all.
Afford in this context does not mean have the money for at this exact moment. It means being able to pay and being able to continue to pay for all of the other things you want or have to pay for in life.
Many people buy things they can pay for but they can't afford.
It is possible that your can afford a level of luxury that he cannot. If you chose the hotels and he couldn't afford them he may have been too embarrassed to say no. This is super common early in relationships.
Your may be worried that he is using you for your money. If you are afraid of that then you are already in a bad place in your relationship.
If there is a wealth imbalance, either you suck it up or you end it. It you think he is using you, end it
If there is not a wealth imbalance, one of you doesn't know what you are capable of affording. Either you are spending too much or he doesn't understand how much he can afford.
The most likely scenario is that he cannot afford it but it's to ashamed to say so. Either you can afford to pay the difference or you can't. If you can't, the vacation costs too much. If you insist on going on a vacation your partner cannot afford and you make him pay half, you are the asshole. It he chose the vacation and is giving you to pay more, he is the asshole.
Either spend less on the vacation so you can both afford it, or it will be a problem.
I have a brother laser, cost me 80bucks. Had to replace my toner once, after about 4000 pages. Cost me 34 bucks to get a new toner. Another 2000 pages in. It just doesn't stop. Unplug it. Leave it unplugged for a month or two. Plug it in, wait a couple minutes, wireless print 50 pages with no driver installs. Unplug.
I can't even imagine not having a ci pipeline anymore. Having more than a single production architecture target complete with test sets, Security audits, linters, multiple languages, multiple hour builds per platform... hundreds to thousands of developers... It's just not possible to even try to make software at scale without it.
I know this is a meme, but just in case someone doesn't actually know. CI saves literally thousands upon thousands of dev hours a year, even for small teams.
My point is that if you only use the parts that don't bring confusion you have a problem... Nobody ever does that in production... Much less with any frameworks. There is no such thing as semantic html at scale or in any modern framework.
If you are serious about help, and you are still early in the process, just one less bottle per night every day for a week, then the next week one less than that.
It takes will power, but if you want it you can do it. It doesn't have to be cold turkey. If you are at a six pack a night, or a 4 pack of some 12% ones you can wean yourself off nightly binge drinking in a month or two.
When you are down to one a night, switch it to one every other night... Then don't buy any for a week. Then you can figure out how to drink more responsibility.
If you are to the point where you drink one when you wake up, you will need medical detox. If you wait... You will probably eventually die from alcohol related diseases.
Amazing. Thank you. It's awesome that zstd has caught up in encode/decode time. There was a solid 5-10 years there nothing came close to lz4 in both.