If you enjoy eating snack foods with lots of food dye powder (mmmm hot Cheetos), but hate the fact that it stains your fingers, eat them with chopsticks. No mess on your fingers.

If you struggle with your sandwich/burger innards sliding out of the bread/bun when you take a bite, wrap the innards in lettuce like a taco; place in between the bread/buns with the bottom of the "taco" away from the side you're eating. The lettuce should help keep the sandwich/burger from falling out of the bun.

I personally don't like the texture of kiwi skins. Even thinking about it is giving me the ick.

Someone contact Italy to get this man a prize; he didn't break the noodles!

Is this when Krusty gets his knockers? He looks at least 10 years younger, plus the doc did his breasts.

I think he's on the run from the mob in that episode. The one where he opens a clown college and Homer attends.

Game recognizes game.

I've been sitting here on and off for the last couple hours, wracking my brain for Grampa episodes. I have The Simpsons on in the background (as I am wont to do), but still couldn't narrow it down until this hint. Now I think I've got it.

Abe gets a girlfriend at the retirement castle, but she's a hussy who only likes him for his access to a car (Homer's) and his ability to drive. When Homer revokes access to the car, she dumps Abe for another guy who has a car. She and the guy go on a trip and Abe steals Homer's car with Bart to follow her. Abe ends up confronting her in a surprise twist after making it seem like he was going to beg for her back.

Did I get it? I'm still not 100% sure. Until this hint, I was heavily leaning toward the Flying Hellfish episode, since "battleship" and "military" are thematically linked.

what the hell Vance is

A couch-fucking weirdo, from what I've heard.

Given the fact that your question has caused The Evil Song to get stuck in my head, Sorcerer, I feel you are obligated to erase "It's a Small World" from my mind and from existence.

Please and thank you.

Oh, this one is hard.

My brain wants to say "you sunk my scrabble ship," but I can't remember anything else about the episode.

Another correction of the headline:

“Y'all Cannot Actually Be This Stupid”: an argument on how people are, in fact, this stupid.

She is so lucky she found you!!

Omfg I feel you so hard on this with a few people, but am fortunate to not be in Texas.

"Never again," my ass. Those types of people mean only "never again for me and mine." Genocide is genocide is genocide, regardless of whether we're the victim or not.

I remember your post from when you first found Boudicca! They look so sweet; it's nice to enjoy a nap after an adventure to the vet. 💕

Fellow American Jew here. Very much agreed. Israel doesn't represent us, even if it tries to say it does.

I was always more of a Walrus fan. Goo goo ga joob

I'm full of popcorn already. It's time for the movie to finally wrap up and the villain to get his ass handed to him. :(

I voted for this guy before and thought I'd continue to do so, but the crap he's been pulling recently-ish has just confirmed for me he won't ever get my vote again. What a jagoff.

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The negative space between the eggs around his head in this image makes him look like he has pigtails. Saw it and had to punish/reward everyone else with it, too.

I like to think of it like a broken bone. Yes, your overall health is important; no one is questioning that. But if you go into the ER with a broken bone and the doctor tells you that they're going to ignore your injury in favor of telling you to take your vitamins, they're an asshole who doesn't care about your pain or healing your injury.

Systemic racism is the broken bone. No one (except, perhaps, assholes and billionaires) disagrees that all lives have value. Saying "all lives matter" in response to "black lives matter," though, is saying "let's wilfully ignore the problem because I am clearly okay with the status quo."

Edit to fix typo.