PurrLure [she/her] @ PurrLure @hexbear.net

Waaaaow (Based based based based based)

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Joined

5 yr. ago

I bet my childhood church is fucking pissed.

The only kind of summer camp that should ever get hit with a flash flood.

Even with a job where you sit on your ass all day you will eventually burn out. All it takes is one stressful project.

But then you take into account both the emotional and physical labor retail takes and hahahahaha yeah that's jokerfying shit right there.

I know the amount of Goodwill's in the USA make it really easy to go to their drive thru and easily drop off your old stuff, but I recommend going the extra mile and looking up a better charity farther away.

It takes us twice as long, but my partner and I recently switched to a super gay thrift that also does free STD testing and we have no regrets.

Donated, flash floods are terrifying even compared to hurricanes.

I cackled so loud my partner busted out of their room thinking I was crying and needed a hug lmao, thanks.

A-Are they trying to give us some of their food in a desperate attempt to stop us from ruining their ecosystem?

Like this is a relatively recent phenomenon, right?

It works for both businesses, incredible.

Hoy boy you're digging up some repressed childhood memories here.

So like 25 years ago or so my old childhood Christian church that had a strong focus on missionary work decided to run a children's play on how cool and good Christian missionaries are and how we should all grow up to be little missionaries in our own little ways.

But it wasn't good enough to just focus on their own American version of colonialist Christianity during the play, no no no, they just had to made kids dress up in other religion's fake sterotype outfits, go up to the stage in a line, and a light would fall individually on each kid as they read their memorized lines about how stupid everyone else's religions are. They wanted every religion shown on stage to be as dumbed down and silly as possible, so I think either gaia worship or paganism was included with a shitty hippy costume. I wish I could remember the name of the play, because it wasn't just something the pastor's mom made up on the spot. Nah, it had a whole ass merch line, apparently this was a play our old church bought the rights to. I know this because my youth group got to go to a Christian convention shortly after and vendors were selling books, shirts, and paper advertising for it. If I remember right the advertising had like a fake precious memories art style mixed with 90's world peace themed cheap looking clip art where everyone smiles and holds hands because Jesus loves them? If you're a former American Christian maybe you know what I'm talking about, my memory is foggy.

Anyways, now that I'm an adult and can look back just to laugh at this, if anyone could let me know what that church play was called that would be very poggers. I want to look up cursed youtube footage of it to make my partner cringe, ok thanks bye.

You know that one guy from way back, uuuuuh I think his name was ah John Brown?

Yeah so it turns out he didn't do anything wrong.

It would be absolutely cursed if the best way to get a home in America was to copy and paste a bunch of ape nft screencaps and pretend you have a million dollar collection.

Who am I kidding, they'd probably count that as banking fraud and send your ass to jail within months.

I saw a youtube news clip title that made it sound like Trump had a heated gamer moment on live TV.

Guy forces out cussing like Shadow the Edgehog.

(How do we not have a Shadow emote yet???)

Congrats, can confirm that rural carrier positions are not worth the extra couple bucks they throw at you per hour.

The city carrier union is older and generally stronger than the rural one. Yes, they're two separate unions to weaken bargaining power.

Honestly, it sucks, but it's also helped me cut down on unnecessary purchases.

It's just a shame that even the more expensive niche clothes I save up for nowadays tends to only last 2-3 years, and occasionally even come with day 1 issues like fraying or little holes in-between seams.

I've started bulk purchasing the basics in case the quality goes down, (or the cost goes up), ever since the trade war news this year. I guess I'll see if it's worth it by the end of the year.

Yeah, I hear this one at work all the time. Sure thing boss.

They could even do Five Nights at Freddy's and other indie horror collab events at night for additional sales where dressed up staffers chase you around in the dark. Just have people sign waivers first.

Hell, let people pay extra to watch the security cameras with staff to really get into the roleplay.