Contramuffin @ Contramuffin @lemmy.world

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854

Joined

2 yr. ago

He's a troll. He's been making posts like these and then calling everyone who responds as autistic.

While some see this as an academic lifeline, others view it as France capitalizing on a U.S. brain drain under anti-science policies

I don't necessarily see how these are opposing viewpoints. Both are certainly true

Does me having autism increase your chances of finding a significant other?

What?

1. Not really, no. Love and attraction are different things. You don't need to be attracted to someone you love.
2. Unless you find your partner unattractive, I don't see how sex could meaningfully change
3. People are good at picking up social cues. That's probably what you're referring to. Humans are social creatures, after all. Also, people are trash at picking up social cues, so you're probably also missing a lot of cues.
4. That sounds like a really bad idea. Your sense of how common those relationships issues occur is warped. People don't generally go into relationships trying to exploit someone. You're going to cause issues (moral, logistical, and practical) with your plan, all because of a concern that's not likely to happen.
5. That's the vast majority of humans. We are a monogamous species, after all. When you see "alpha males" on the internet, just be aware that they're grifters that want your money. And the best way to make sure you keep giving them money is to make sure that you stay single and unhappy.
6. Can't help you there. I can at least tell you that enacting your plan in question 4 is going to lower your chances of finding a wife to 0.

Antimeme, not BHJ. BHJ involves reinterpreting a meme into something that is not relevant to either the intended meme format or the source material. Basically, intentionally missing the point of the meme

For instance, a BHJ here might say something like "I'm sad that I ran out of money right before I finished my Terminator costume"

The other comments cover things pretty well, but I feel like I should also pitch in as well. I'm in my mid-20's in a stable relationship of over 3 years (at least a part of which was long distance), so I could probably offer some more age-specific advice.

I find that a lot of younger people (ie, people at or below my age) put a lot of undue emphasis on social media. Liking a post, not liking a post, follow, not follow, whatever. These are all contrivances. They are a game designed by social media companies to keep people doomscrolling on their platform. It's important to see and really understand that it genuinely does not matter what someone does on social media. Your boyfriend seems not to have interacted with the Instagram model after he got with you. So that's good right? If that's what's really important to you, then why does it matter if he still follows her?

And even if we assume that he was still actively interacting with the model, that's still fine. It's important to know that there is a difference between attraction and love. Love is the very specific feeling of caring about the other person and wanting the best for them. Many younger people think that attraction and love are the same, and so a lot of drama gets started because neither side realizes that they're mixing up their ideas of what a relationship should be like. One common issue to be aware of (and most relevant to this situation) is that being attracted to someone else is not love, and it's not cheating. It is ok to find other people attractive, and likewise, you should not find it offensive if your boyfriend finds someone else attractive.

I will also caution that many younger couples have this expectation that their partners should allow them to go through the other person's phones. This is extremely toxic. Don't do that. People have a right to their own private life, even when they are in a relationship. This applies to social media as well. You shouldn't be looking through your boyfriend's Instagram just because you want to see if he's following anyone that you don't like. Remember that a relationship is built on trust, and that means that you need to trust your boyfriend to be loyal.

You might be thinking that if you shouldn't look through people's phones, then it's really easy for your boyfriend to cheat for a long time without you knowing. And that's true. That's why cheating hurts so much. But that possibility doesn't give you the permission to intrude on their privacy. Have faith in your boyfriend.

Finally, practice open communication and mindfulness. I find that it can be quite difficult to identify what exactly is bothering you, and talking to your boyfriend about a vague sense of jealousy isn't going to be productive at all. In fact, it's probably going to get him defensive. When you're angry, disappointed, upset, jealous, etc., it's important to take some time to think things through yourself first. These negative feelings tend to result from the feeling that one of your personal rights was violated. If you're angry or upset, which specific action caused it? Which of your personal rights was violated by that action? It is really important to identify this, since the difference between toxic behavior and valid anger is oftentimes just based on how valid the answers are to those questions. For instance, the "right to your boyfriend's attention" is not a real right that you have, and so if you were to get angry that your boyfriend isn't giving you enough attention, that would, in fact, be toxic behavior. And if you do have a right to be angry, then knowing which of your rights was violated makes it easy to prove your point, so there's no downsides to this approach.

You should be aware that there are many reasons why a guy cannot get hard. Being dehydrated, for instance, makes it really difficult to stay erect. Many guys can get pretty insecure about it, so his reaction sounds about right.

I would recommend that you not blame him for not getting hard. It just happens sometimes and that's just something that you two will have to work around

In the past, he was a gaming streamer. During many of his streams, his actions and words strongly suggested that he was racist and/or a Nazi. At least once, he was called out for using the n-word (with the hard r). He has never expressed any remorse.

Because of that, many people consider him to be the gateway of the alt-right pipeline. Essentially, children are attracted to his channel for the gaming content, and over time, they are influenced by his behavior to be increasingly accepting of racist and/or alt-right content (after which the YouTube algorithm will then feed them increasingly extremist content)

Since at least several years ago, he retired from his channel, started a family, and moved to Japan (not necessarily in that order). It's entirely unclear if he's changed his mind about any of his previous behaviors, and in the absence of any indicators of change, many people take the stance that he probably still is a racist/Nazi

It could be a misconfigured bios, it could also just be broken. Would it affect you if the 4080 turns out to just be broken?

It would, but Steam only kind of enforces the rule. They seem to enforce the rule if there is a significant and constant history of pricing a game lower on another platform (eg Humble Bundle)

The constitution also didn't say "the president shall give a shit about the law"

Rookie mistake, IMO

No. Your post, your rules

If a donut were to have a center of mass, would the center of mass be like this or like this?

1000-2000 hours in several games. It's a mix of several reasons:

1. Some games are more replayable than others. My high-playtime games tend to be roguelikes, played over multiple years
2. The more you play something, the more of a comfort game it gets. It becomes easier to just play it mindlessly if you just want to turn off your brain
3. Some games have inconvenient save systems, intentional or otherwise (especially true for roguelikes). This incentivizes you to just leave the game running overnight instead of saving and quitting. Just once and you're looking at ~20 hours added to your playtime. Rinse and repeat for multiple nights

People say that aiming with bows is easier? What kind of world do they live in?

I've shot a decent amount of bows and guns, and guns are far easier to shoot. The difference is that because guns are easier to shoot, there's a greater expectation of accuracy. Shooting a bow at 30 meters and hitting your target is considered accurate, shooting a gun at 30 meters is considered nothing.

That being said, I still like archery more. There's just something very personal about the experience of pulling the bowstring and manually making the arrow fly

Annoyingly vague title... Why not just say "new study shows that evolution can occur at different rates"

Even before Trump and Vance lashed out, it was a shitshow. Every time Zelenskyy brought up security, Trump dismissed it because the the minerals were "more important."

European leaders were certainly watching, and their main takeaway was certainly that Trump can and will sacrifice the security of American allies for money.

Europe and many of the US's allies had lower military spending and did not to pursue nuclear programs because there was the expectation that the US would help protect these countries. This was exactly the promise that the US gave to Ukraine that got them to give up their nuclear research.

Now that it's become clear that the US cannot be relied upon for security, many of the US's allies are certain to start reconsidering their stance on the military and nuclear weapons. As US soft power crumbles, I expect that new, smaller factions will arise to fill the void, and I expect that China will likely try to expand its influence as well.

The paper fan, it's the most annoying/fun because it's so easy to stunlock other people

In most native English accents, R is pronounced by curling the tongue very significantly (more than most languages that I'm familiar with). People who aren't used to this (often people who speak English as a second language) won't curl their tongues enough, and the partially curled tongue will end up touching the roof of their mouths. This happens to be how you pronounce L, so in these accents, R and L will end up sounding the same.

Try getting into the habit of curling your tongue more when you pronounce R, and you'll end up hearing a difference