Won't let me use someone else's (free) rewards card? No problem, i'll make you sign me up for another card!
You simply hire at least two poets to recite verse simultaneously, and you go where they go. Multi. Verse.
For your consideration:WordArt + Comic Sans = (edit: This took me like two minutes in Powerpoint, someone please make something, anything, that's better than this, otherwise this is what we'll end up with)
Why not Zoidberg?