Oh boy, this is going to be one of those +600 New Posts kind of days
I think I've said it before, but Norway is a playground for American and British intelligence.
Israel has spent several years trying to built datasenters in Rogaland and the US has a military airport in Sola, where the owners got granted permission to operate without having to follow norwegian law.
We are cooked.
"You take the blue Lunchly... the stream ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red Lunchly... you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the pedo allegations go."
This is what happens when someone is so hollowed out by hyperconsumerism that buying a fucking flashlight becomes a substitution for an identity.
This sad motherfucker soyfaces over flashlights like they were funko pops and knows more "boutique" flashlight brands than he knows people.
He has strong opinions on every minute detail of his purchases like the bevelling on the glass rims or the best method to turn the fucking light on.
He probably follows the companies' management on twitter and has intense opinions on the companies, in the way a lib redditor will know every minutiae of his political party's niche actors and figures.
A perfect consumerist zombie with no thoughts or actions that aren't filtered through consuming his Product(tm).
Absolutely horrifying.
I just discovered the remake of Car Seat Headrest's Face To Face album after sleeping on the original when it came out in 2011.
God damn, why am I getting these feels? I'm not even gay and I'm all like >tfw no bf
Yup. I've said it before, but Norwegians take russia-hysteria to a whole other level.
10 year old me: 
30 year old me: 
"Are you sure, doc?"
The doctor pulls out his Smith & Wesson and turns the boy's brains into meat confetti.
"I am now. 800 bucks, please."
Pendejo Time.
Jake and Thomas are two guys with fucked up pasts, just shooting the shit and improvising.
The only podcast that scratches the cumtown itch.
My favourite bit:
Speak for yourself. My JO crystal is so supercharged I can levitate up to 6 cm from the ground and yell louder than a police siren.
I have won several fights by blinding my opponent with the flash of the JO crystal as I crank my hog with one hand and swing my crystal with the other.
My seed has become so powerful, I'm banned from donating semen in 17 countries, including Papua New Guinea and the Pharoe Island.
I have channeled the unholy energies from my magnetic wristbands and wooden bracelets to erect a dark labyrinth to contain me so I won't accidentally break reality apart when I crank my hawg too hard.
Do not underestimate the power of crystals.
Posting a video of you roasting an unidentified roadkill over a disposable charcoal grill during a gender reveal party was not okay, dude.
Man, Dutch is such a fucked up language.
I don't even speak it, but I understand like 80% of it if I just imagine the speaker is a drunk Dane trying to speak English.
My local classic rock radio station played Welcome To The Black Parade.
It's truly over, bros.
