SBF sentenced to 25 years

Sam Bankman is now fried

But seriously, it's a very convenient end to this whole situation that there's now a big "THE END" sign hovering in front of a clusterfuck of financial crimes, with one very prominent face behind bars. Are we supposed to believe that this is it? That there's not dozens of other professional money whisperers getting away scot-free, and already planning their next move?

lmao this turns Bankman-Fried into an example of nominative determinism
- You defraud the bank and, man, you're fried.

Naturally orange hell site is busy explaining why 25 years is too much because since his crime is so big he obviously cant repay anything or learn anything. That means any prison time is just revenge to them.

EDIT: They even admit that they can lose tens of thousands to the guy and still think mugging is worse and they would want to see them punished worse.

lol literally just admitting they only care about being robbed if its a poor person doing it
So if I personally rob them I'm sure I'd be granted the same latitude by them.
- No because robbing is for poor people when you are rich its called fraud. You see if you lie to someone and then take their money its different than threatening them and taking their money.
Ghouls are gonna ghoul.

You people just don't understand, this is good for Bitcoin :cryptocurrency:

Seems like kind of a long time for finance crimes, but then I looked up Bernie Madoff, and he got 150 years and died in the clink in 2021

SBF is only 32. He'll be out and criming by 2050.

Jailman Jailed

This dude deserves it, but the only reason he's actually doing time is that he broke the cardinal rule of "don't fuck over institutional investors". Did any CEOs go to jail for doing mass mortgage fraud in 2008?

no, in fact they just changed the rules of the game affecting the whole rest of the world
that's what happens when you're part of the club
Exactly. He’s just the new bernie madoff: don’t steal from the rich is the only lesson here.

lol

good he's been devastating to the curly haired man community (me)

A guy dressed as Sheldon from the big bang theory tried to make fun of my friend on Halloween because he has hair like SBF (so do I for that matter)
Let me reiterate: A guy dressed like fucking Sheldon
It's been a nightmare out here
- brother I can completely commiserate with you my coworker shyly asked me today if I was planning on getting a haircut anytime soon and I had to hit them with a stern "no I actually like my hair this long" (and because it is naturally a way curlier fro than SBF's, the weight of it has unfortunately caused my curls and hair to look EXACTLY like his does in this pic)

Scamming crypto bros is kinda based though

It pretty much the only reason he got 25.

Cool, now put all the dipshits that mistook his ADHD for genus in jail. If you're big business boy and you can't even tell when a loser is playing you, you don't deserve to be a big business boy.

You can't just throw every MBA in jail like that. Who's going to funnel the maintenance budget into stock buybacks at my company?
- just throw every MBA in jail
- Don't forget screwing up Boeing. They went from making incredibly good planes like the original 747, to the 737 MAX variants which constantly get involved in accidents. All because the MBA bean counters got to be in charge instead of the engineers.
Rooskie, I suggest you don't mistake his grifting as "ADHD"...

This won't bring back my funged apes

Glad to see that Mr. Some Banking Fraud is finally going to jail. Deserves a longer sentence honestly.

Wonder what's going to happen to all his business partners, including his girlfriend. Surely this is a green light to go after them too?

Extremely rare US judicial system W

This is autistic discrimination, probably.

In like 150 years they’ll be as appalled at this as we are at when they put like disabled people on display in the circus.

Is this a bit?
- Of course it is
- It’s actually not. It sends like there is something really off with the guy. Some type of neurodivergence.
  Also i don’t care that he scammed rich tech and crypto bros.
If the polycule is cringe, it’s off to the bin

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

More like kleptocurrency amirite?

I feel sorry for this guy, but only cause there"s way worse people than him walking free.

Why do tech bros all look like that? Regardless of race, they all kind of have a similar appearance, don’t they?

You mean the empty eyed serial killer stare?
The computer deamons steal the soul.
Techbros I know are either bloodthirsty MIC bros that look like Stonetoss (aka Hans Christian Graebener) and probably post on NCD, or they're just friendly goofs that look a little bit like SBF and talk like Elon. Maybe it tracks.
- Of Sping, TX?
Honestly it seems to have helped him in weird ways. I even kept forgetting how old he is, and a lot of media also kind of kept talking about him like he was some kind of child. At a certain point, I almost think his team and he himself made sure to not "clean him up." Just keep the look of some tech startup kid that never puts time into hygiene and too focused on the "go fast, break things" shit. He knew what he was doing, his parents knew (and encouraged it while demanding their cuts), and at least the others that were at the top also knew. This wasn't just some minor error (aside getting caught and thinking they could get it back). I also see it as the logical next step for what more traditional bank fraud assholes already do. Just done by people that don't actually know how to be smarter with the greed and the grift.
Another example of "smart" people in one field thinking they are "smart" about everything. Hubris and the false sense of intelligence (and especially the "fake it till you make it" shit we see in all fields these days) is going to be getting worse as everyone is in the bubble of "yes men" and trying to climb fucking ladders into positions they have no understanding of. But that is more a rant of how capitalism is in for a real real bad crash, and no one knows how to do shit anymore (most importantly the fucks wanting power and money for the clout).

Haven't they found a few people that ripped off crypto fools in suitcases?

He should have gotten way more than 25yrs. Should have gotten the death penalty like similar people like him get in China. Same for his parents.

A carceral state of mind
They almost always end up commuting the death sentence to prison

I mashed together a couple posts by a dipshit law guy on Bluesky...

Back in November 2023, I told Forbes I'd be surprised if SBF received less than 25 years. I interpret this sentence to mean that Judge Kaplan would NEVER sentence a white collar criminal to more than 25 years, no matter how reprehensible. Judge Kaplan found that Mr. Bankman-Fried was "the worst he had seen in 30 years on the bench" and then imposed this sentence.
https://bsky.app/profile/mitchellepner.bsky.social/post/3korpydosvw2m

"I interpret"? I love it when a dipshit law guy reinvents the wheel.

Owned

Bluesky comment.

I wonder if a lot of it might also come down to bureau of prisons policy. >30 years you gotta be in high security?

Hahahaha

What a bozo.