Have you ever met anyone who is the polar opposite of a hoarder? Like someone who cannot tolerate owning stuff and frequently throws out or sells stuff they need which they later need to buy again.
Have you ever met anyone who is the polar opposite of a hoarder? Like someone who cannot tolerate owning stuff and frequently throws out or sells stuff they need which they later need to buy again.
Not me usually, but if I've been hoarding an item for years and throw it out, you better believe I'm gonna need that item a week after I toss it
I have a strategy to avoid this. You might find it helpful also.
I go through stuff and set aside in boxes anything that I think might be useful, but I don’t really want or need. This brings that item into my mind, the same way throwing it out does. I label the boxes with the date, and either donate or trash, and put stuff in accordingly.
If a box sits unopened for 6 months, I toss it or donate it without opening it and seeing what’s inside. If I open a box to use something, I put the new date on it and reset the clock.
Then there’s no pain from actually getting rid of stuff. There’s no “man I just threw that out!” regret.
you'd* better believe
How does "had" add anything? how does one "had better." how is that grammar, how is it semantically useful. Its just an extra verb someone decided sounded good in middle english that weve been lugging around all this time. Its also not the correct tense for that sentence; for the future perfect tense in which the sentence was written, shouldnt it be "you've better?" or perhaps "you will have better?" even that isn't grammar though, and it doesn't actually semantically mean "you would be better to believe..." which is what both "you better" and "you'd better" are intended to be understood as. In my opinion.
tl;dr:
you* better believe
I quite literally came here to post this exact image.
You win. This time!
Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while lol
Yep, I'm an inveterate purger. I have tried to control the purging with a policy of hanging onto things such as power tools for one year past its last use. And almost invariably, about two weeks after I finally got rid of the thing, I need it again.
In my case, I have a very small living space, so hanging onto things just means they're in my way. But I was like this even when I had a large house.
Hi!
I believe in having a small footprint and i move alot. I am this person.
The post above you says you have borderline personality disorder. Sorry pal.
Yes, my mother is one of those people.
She was freaking out about all the stuff I had left in her attic when I moved out (and overseas) years before. I was confused because I didn't leave that much. And sure enough, my brother looked up there and all that clutter consisted of three small boxes sitting in the middle of a totally empty attic.
Every few years she throws out or gives away anything she considers unused or unwanted, including things that to others would have significant sentimental value. And often she ends up having to buy new items because she threw that same thing out a year before.
She is the anti-hoarder.
A minimalist?
Minimalism is a conspiracy by Big Small to see you more Less.
Yes, that person is me.
I am not from the US but move here , and what I notices its that most Americans throw a lot of stuff away. Like even if it can be fixed very simple they just throw it away and buy a new one.
That’s how many of us start in the direction of hoarding: “this can be fixed, it would be a shame to just throw it away”.
You could argue it’s just too cheap and easy to buy a new thing, so old things are no longer worth fixing, and guilt at throwing out is vestigial
I think there is a smaller population that won't throw things away because they have this idea that these things will grow in value
I'm a condo superintendent and I've made so much money on the good stuff that these upper middle class people throw away.
I've thrown things away that I know I could fix because I simply didn't have time. Working long hours to get by, and investing time in family and friends was more important, so it would take so long to get the thing fixed that something else about it would have broken just from waiting around. Eventually, I decided I can live without the thing or it's too important to daily life to go without is as long as it would take me to get it going.
Even more extreme, actually. I knew one person who was actually, honestly, voluntarily homeless. For years. Living on the street, no car. No obvious mental health issues, had family who would have been happy to take him in, strong social network, active in the community. Didn't want to be tied to all of the things ownership of stuff brings, and was willing to make the many and extreme sacrifices that entails.
To be clear, this is not the normal homelessness experience. I've known too many homeless people, and the right-wing conspiracy theories of middle to upper class panhandlers on every corner are utter nonsense. Ideologically motivated self justifying cruelty inspiring bullshit. Even when homeless people I have known said it was by choice, I usually knew enough about their situation to recognize it as a face saving salve to their pride (a hard thing to come by in the lower rungs of society, and very precious). But there was that one.
A modern-day Diogenes of Synope?
No, a lot less confrontational.
Was he a retired investigator from the marines?
I seriously doubt it
I call them philosophers. Whether or not they are coherent is another thing.
I have become one. I lost everything in my life four times somewhat involuntarily. The fifth time I did it intentionally.
Yeah after loosing everything multiple times I developed an anti-attachment kind of feeling to things and people.
It's a boring just surviving type of life now. I do what I need to to survive but have no intentions of ownership on anything and don't feel like investing so much time in relationships.
But almost two years ago I bought my first car (I was 44) and I don't want to loose it as I love driving around aimlessly, it keeps my mind busy has a great sound for music and I control the climate. (It's always too cold or hot at work and too cold at home). If it was not for the cost I would spend most of my time driving but I have to preserve the vehicle as long as possible and don't have much money for maintenance amd gas.
It's weird how I could loose almost anything and would not be phased by it. But please let me keep my car, it's the only reason I wake up to go to work and have some hope for the future. But my insurance got raised by 25% last year apparently because other people are bad drivers (I was told too many claims cost insurers too much but I never made a claim, so cause of too many bad drivers I have to pay for them, fuck them charge them or don't let them drive why me !) , gas and parts and everything necessary has gone up and if I don't get a substantial raise I won't be able to keep up.
I live in my car. I love being on the road. I spent the winter around Tucson but I am itching to get back on the road. People are getting to be terrible drivers, new cars are outrageously priced and my insurance has skyrocketed too.
I have learned to sit in my car rather than moving. That helps. I have learned that I can buy coffee at a coffee shop for less than it costs to drive around, so I treat myself.
the need to purge belongings is a form of clutching for control over your life, usually with the idea that one is starting anew in some way, and can be a symptom of borderline personality disorder in my experience
i wouldn't compare it to minimalism
Yeah, but holding onto stuff. That's probably a symptom of it too. So who knows.
Yeah, there is a whole lifestyle around that. Or well, maybe it's more like a religion. It's called minimalism.
I live that way. Religion is on point for some of the people in the community. But most people are chill and just don't want to feel bothered by having "stuff" around they haven't used in ages and that just catches dust. For example I love reading books. Most of them I sell or give away to charity afterwards, if I'm sure I will not read them again, so that others can read them too and a new one doesn't have to be produced.
Me. I come from a zero waste family. I hate buying stuff and use as little of things as I can. Don't really sell stuff but own as little stuff as I need
Have you seen the "does it spark joy" woman?
But not everything sparks joy tho, some things you keep around because they’re a necessity (like cable adapters and shoe salt stain removers)
I unironically use this one all the time, because it captures both sentimental and practical value for me. I just compare the thing itself with the joy of having that much more clean empty space.
Yeah my mate used to throw out all his spare computer cables or excess material from a home repair job. He's since learned to keep them
It's worth keeping old computer stuff, just in case. But ever so often you have to get rid of the truly obsolete stuff. I tossed out several kilos of old analogue cables a few years ago.
To the chagrin of my dad, my mom. We went through a period of time growing up where things like a waffle iron, ice cream machine, or bread maker were bought by Dad and discarded by Mom like 3 times in about a year "because you never use them."
My ex wife was like this. Would throw out kids toys and get rid of 'extra' kitchen knives without any communication.
My friend buys a boat, uses it twice, then sells it. A couple months later he buys a boat... This has happened for years. Either he's really picky about the boat he wants to fish on, or he actually hates boats and fishing but can't admit it to himself.
Or doesn't want to do the maintenance?
My thought as well. If he can buy it used and sell it for pretty close to what he paid, this might just be a more complicated yet flexible way of renting a boat.
I wish I were like this myself.
A couple summers ago I list almost everything I owned, due to being unable to pay the bill on a storage unit.
It’s been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve never felt more free and whole.
I had a friend who lost the family house (100+ year old farmhouse) with 4 generations worth of heirlooms and antiques and so on in a bushfire a few years ago. He will never ever admit it to his family but he swears its the best thing that ever could have happened.
He never could have sold great grandads dining room table he built with his own 2 hands it was the size of a fucking snooker table and weighed about the same and took up the biggest room in the house... now its just gone
Yeah, often things that I'd bought her, it was very annoying.
I'm sure these are along the lines people think of me. I often will mention anything more than I need to enjoy myself is considered excessive to my mind. Clothing of every style, carpeting galore, lighting for every square meter, houses that stretch whole plots, do I need any of that?
I have a bit of a split response to this. On one hand, I have a workshop which is absolutely packed with tools, machines, materials and so on. I can make and repair almost anything in there. Many people would look in the workshop and assume I am a hoarder.
But as far as my living space, I love a clean, uncluttered place. I will get rid of kitchen gadgets, books, disks, furniture, clothes, etc if it is not adding something useful or beautiful to my life. I have half a dozen matching t-shirts same for underwear and socks. I will regularly go through out kitchen cupboards and take things we can't/don't use to other people or food bank etc. I am a frequent visitor of the "tip shop" near where I live and things get repurposed and rehomed there. I love a clean streamlined life, I would be more streamlined if the people I live with were more into that mindset 😁
I believe that's called an Ascetic.
An acetic does not buy new things again, its more like a permanent state of extreme minimalism.
My mom. My parents have moved a few times and each time she throws out more and more. Their lifestyle is extremely Spartan.
If you calculate the cost of moving something it quickly becomes obvious that it's cheaper to get rid of many things than to move them.
Three piles. Background, I moved roughly every two years from 1 until mid twenties. Not a military family. Even with this I still move several boxes of stuff that I never open until the next move.
First pile is stuff you must keep/love.
Second is stuff that is okay or may be nice-to-have.
Third is stuff that can be sold/donated/disposed of.
Get rid of the last two piles.
I think this is me? Though I avoid repeat purchasing.
I do this because I let things clutter and then I can’t think if there’s too much clutter. I’ve been thinking of cleaning out my drawers for a while...lord have mercy on my stuff 🙏
I think I've met myself, yes.
Yes, but they were all old people so it made sense.
I’m somehow both. I frequently buy something, and discover when I get home that I already have several of said thing. ADHD medication is helping this a little…
I have a friend who, and this is not a typo, has 39 children, 38 of whom are adopted. She absolutely wants nothing and does with as little as possible, I think it's just a side effect of raising that many kids.
Jack Reacher enters the conversation.