Also sometimes you donât get rejected and instead get dragged into a 6 year long abusive relationship with someone with both borderline and narcissistic personality disorder and you end up with ptsd.
If it's a shy, non-commital "no", with zero followup explaining any reasons they don't want to, then sure maybe another ask is in order.
If it's a solid "no", or they start listing off excuses or reasons after a tepid no... They probably actually don't want it. It COULD be something like anxiety making them say, "no" and stammer out some weak excusable excuses, but that is rare compared to someone who just wants to politely say no.
Sometimes itâs better to just get it out there, regardless of the outcome, rather than let that feeling fester within you for years. Or you look back later on in life and think, âI shouldâve said somethingâŠâ, or âWhy didnât I everâŠâ. It sucks donkey balls getting rejected and youâre probably more likely to get rejected than not, but itâs still something you should do in spite of the odds. Like my hot cousin, I always wonder what mightâve been had I made a move, but Iâll never know and thatâll stay with me for a lifetime now.
Minus the cousin bit, I knew of a guy who lived in Washington that did just that, just got it out there. Ken Pinyan, he was a Boeing engineer. Everyone just called him Mr. Hands.