Deserved? Poll inside
This is about this
I made this with photo editing tools bc I can't defeat 4chan's captchas
Poll:
https://strawpoll.com/NMnQNvjeBg6
Poll Results:
https://lemmyverse.link/lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/28960622
ITT: people taking a shitpost from 4chan seriously.
I made this greentext with photoshop in response to this post
You can discuss the events of a story, and the relative morality and social etiquette of the characters in it, even if the whole thing is entirely fiction. Functionally, it makes no difference if it really happened or it didn't. Sometimes that matters, but here is doesn't. You don't know these people, you'll never meet these people, and there's no real-world effect of discussing this story (except maybe someone learns not to touch somebody else's food?).
Fuck it, you could be a bot programmed to complain about people taking shitposts seriously. I could be an AI created to respond to your prompts to try to convince you not to complain about fabricated stories. This entire interaction could be four bots engaged in a learning exercise in a simulated online forum. Or maybe it was all a dream the whole time.
Fuck it, you could be a bot programmed to complain about people taking shitposts seriously.
Now thats a good shitpost comment. You get it.
wow! congratulations! you figured out social media is pretty much useless and entertainment is pointless! this guy is smart because he thinks this a worthless endeavour, and i was really starting to base my whole morality system on this shitpost, thanks for steering me in the right direction! :D
Fuck 4chan
That's a copypasta reference of another post from the guy's perspective.
From his perspective, she is just a weird coworker who likes to touch his food, and he gets tired of telling her off.
liar
source?
In the description https://sh.itjust.works/post/42168198
This sounds like the kind of flirting I'd expect after seeing '80s and '90s teen angst movies. In retrospect screenwriters just don't understand how humans interact, or rather they just don't care and go for madcap antics instead.
I'm way neurodivergent, and was completely unaware of human interaction, so I was looking at Pretty in Pink and St. Elmo's Fire (etc. etc.) trying to decipher how all that works.
I became sexually active at 26 after folks from the kink community noticed my nerdy vibe, and they schooled me in some basic human interaction. (Note that I matrix-dodged a barrage of incel-to-fascist pipeline bullets thanks to some amazing strokes of fortune.)
After the fact, in recollection, I realized then that a lot of women in my young adult life were signalling me and I never knew.
I also realized my aunt was totally hitting on me when I was sixteen. That's all sorts of awkward to reconcile.
"I became sexually active at 26 after folks from the kink community noticed my nerdy vibe, and they schooled me in some basic human interaction."
Solidarity fist bump. My own experience was somewhat different, but there is the common ground of learning communication skills on a lag, and learning from a niche community of lovely weirdos
That's exactly my experience, minus the creepy aunt and the kink community. My girlfriend is the exact same and I still don't know how we managed a first kiss. I wouldn't miss it for the world now, though.
Girl tries flirting by biting lip
<thinking for an adequate response...>
I use arch btw
you ever moderated an online forum, big guy? Yeah, I bet you have.
Upper lip or lower lip?
Does the distro depend on it
Her own, or his?
But do you actually use arch?
no :( ubuntu or fedora. I am not worthy quickly leaves in shame
Sploosh
It's not weird to touch other people's food everyone does it just for fun. Go to your neighbor's house and touch their food and you can laugh together.
ngl, I usually touch my own food, not sure how to eat it otherwise
I simply unhinge my jaw and let it slide down my throats.
Well, given your username, I'm no longer sure whether I should allow my guts and food to interact.
I'm also curious whether you made a typo and were too stubborn to correct it, whether it was intentional, or whether I'm imagining the whole thing.
Honestly, I have so few people in my life that finding out one (or more) were a figment of imagination is a genuine phobia of mine. I've freaked out my wife by debating that there's no way I can be certain she's real. (Though the evidence does support it.)
Anyone who sticks their hands in my food uninvited is not someone I would like a relationship with.
Respect boundaries.
"Touching his food" can run the gamut between:
Take one of his potato chips and eat it
to
Stick my thumb in his soup
If a friend or family member took one of my potato chips and ate it, I'd probably be fine with it. At worst I'd be a little annoyed. If an acquaintance or cow-orker did that it would be a little more strange, but not the end of the world. But, the other end of the spectrum is much weirder.
Grabbing a potato chip, if done carefully, will mean not touching anything else. Any dirt or germs on the toucher's hands aren't going to get spread around the rest of the food, but touching a liquid or something with sauce on it is different. IMO, touching someone's pasta is definitely on the germ-spreading end of the scale.
I can't respond to your other comment bc snooggums is banned from my instance
It’s one of those things that works in movies because it’s something you can get away with if you’re incredibly attractive. There’s a whole stock images category involving girls licking their fingers, mostly in a seductive style. But, in the real world, it’s something you do with your husband or long-term partner, not a random cow-orker.
I think this is what people aren't understanding. Someone who does this repeatedly surely must have learned that it's okay/works from a history of doing it, so they're probably very attractive. I'm pretty confident that most normies would react much more playfully/positively than the responses in the comments here if an incredibly attractive person did this to them. If the goal is to swap spit anyway, you're not gonna be thinking about the germs on their fingers
Attractiveness is both subjective and situational and people are often terrible at judging their subjective attractiveness to particular others.
There are also lots of reasons not to want to be persued starting with being in a relationship
Also peoples attitude towards germs and hygiene varies wildly.
The greatest sin of this comment is to suppose that because someone does something it makes sense even in their own subjective context. People are both weird and stupid.
I disagree, you don’t scratch your own butthole with your tongue unless you’re a cat.
I'm not sure if the guy was trying to protect his virginity, or if he was genuinely bothered by the damn bitch constantly touching his food. I'd be annoyed too if someone kept sticking their hand in my food every single day.
I’d be annoyed too if someone kept sticking their hand in my food every single day.
i'd say it depends on how hot they are, honestly
Yeah, I met a girl who was 40 once who stuck her fingers in my soup and that was not hot at all because she didn't say anything about that being in kelvin which really ruined my too-hot-and-spicy ramen but it ended up working out because I actually wanted just-warm-and-spicy ramen anyway.
You mean how hot is the food right?
Instead, he smashes my burger to bits without even looking away from his coffee, just stares at me
Without looking away from his coffee
Just stares at me
how he do that
She forgot to mention his lazy eye
She was lounging in his coffee cup like it was a hot tub.
She is his coffee
Is this that feminist riddle again?
I like it when these little dramas align on the front page:
How are we so sure bro wasn't just flirting back?
Because he was smashing the burger, not femanon.
This is not flirting. It is socially maladjusted behaviour. Just because it has worked before doesn't mean it is a good idea.
Pickup artists do all kinds of stupid shit that works that isn't socially acceptable either.
Fake: well obviously
Gay: almost certainly written by a guy
I didn't have to go past femanon to know that this was fake.
I use Debian fyi
The correct response is obviously to demand to lick her finger to get your sauce back
Fake: you said yourself that you made it with photoshop in response to the other greentext
Gay: "Femanons?" Female 4chan users? I don't think they exist.
My brother did this to me once. Not because I was trying to fuck by touching his food, he did it just to fuck with me.
Hey Tungsten5, watch this
Punches the fuck out of my macdons burger, flattening it
He also pulled the same line before doing burnout in my car.
flirting? at the workplace? at this time and age?
That's illegal
Only on Lemmy, is one of the options "I use Arch".
Deserved, you don't mess with people's food PERIOD
you don't fuck with moms spaghetti.
ty for your service
ty for your service
A story that practically glows in the dark with "That Happened" particles.
Definitely a real event that really happened and not some sort of weird incel power fantasy. Only thing missing was a bit at the end where everyone clapped.
OP has said they made it in Photoshop, Sherlock.
This is about this
You don't need photoshop to make a shitpost on 4chan.
seriously who touches others food to flirt?!
Flirty people in movies.
Real people in relationships.
Weirdos who deserve to have their reheated fast food burger smashed.
It's one of those things that works in movies because it's something you can get away with if you're incredibly attractive. There's a whole stock images category involving girls licking their fingers, mostly in a seductive style. But, in the real world, it's something you do with your husband or long-term partner, not a random cow-orker.
LOL my partner is a germaphobe and would be very upset if I touched his food. I'll cook it, sure, but I sure as fuck wouldn't poke his food with my bare hands randomly at dinner.
It wasn’t flirting, but this ADHD positive girl I was crushing on(and was crushing on me) once absentmindedly stuck the tip of her finger in a full glass of water in front of her to ask whose it was and I had to desperately fight falling in love right then and there.
Now, that was an accident born of silly brain vs purposefully fucking with someone’s food so I understand the difference, but I really like my story so…
I'm going to start doing this now. Total power move.
but why fight against it?
I could hear this image.
"In front of my salad!?"
i only hear the asmr version
Fake and gay