Amerikkka has fallen

Several months ago, one of my local weird stores (crystals and witchy supplies) suddenly burst into flame in the middle of the night, didn't do any damage to anything outside of its store, and the local Fire Department completely slapsticked their response like a Three Stooges movie until the fire put itself out. Firefighters were slipping and sliding down the icy sidewalk and per the local news the fire truck slid away down the street with a guy on the ladder, something that shouldn't be possible.

There are scorch marks on the still-standing walls that once separated this store from its neighboring stores in the same building. Even the burning roof put itself out before it got to either of the adjacent stores. It screams of insurance fraud, but the ATF sent a bunch of arson investigators that looked into it for like 5 months, couldn't figure it out and turned it over to some other agency. Literally an actual X-file in my own back yard.