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Programmer Humor @programming.dev

Sjmarf @sh.itjust.works

24h ago

fuck_around/find_out

106 comments

Everyones first language should be brainfuck CMV.

Should else be big_yikes? That seems situational to me.
- It’s actually a comment on the performance loss incurred from a likely failed branch prediction.

Good thing I'm sticking with GDScript.

As much as this hurts, yeet; as an alias throw; is hilarious
- Funnily enough, that is a keyword in rust.
  (it's a placeholder to remove any bikeshedding)
- Of all the gen z lingo yeet is the best.
  
  You can yoink that word from my cold, dead hands!

Big "you damn kids and your phones" vibes from this
- Every generation is peddled two insane concepts:
  When they are young, they are told that they have a weird bizarre vernacular which sounds stupid to everyone else.
  Then when they are old, they are told young people have a weird bizarre vernacular which sounds stupid to everyone else.
  Then you die.
- Yes, and? Get off my lawn!

Aliasing no_cap and cap to true and false.....
I might have to steal that.....

Ugh. Just
its_giving rizz ratios vibe;
No more needless nesting plz
- Honestly, that's about an inch away from Python...
  
  Its literally bash
- Considering vibe is probalby float, I doubt any exceptions can be thrown there, you can eliminate another useless scope.
  Even if it's not float, I'd consider burning alive anyone who overrides an operator like this anyway.
  
  Float? Do you mean fax? Get with the program, old man

I really really dig the fuckaround/findout. It paints the try/catch with a more dreadful undertone and reeks of mystery.
- Yeah, I love that one.
  "Try" is too hopeful. "fuck_around" makes it clear that you know what you're doing is dangerous but you're going to do it anyhow. I know that in some languages wrapping a lot of code in exception blocks is the norm, but I don't like that. I think it should be something you only use rarely, and when you do it's because you know you're doing something that's not safe in some way.
  "Catch" has never satisfied me. I mean, I know what it does, but it doesn't seem to relate to "try". Really, if "try" doesn't succeed, the corresponding block should be "fail". But, then you'd have the confusion of a block named "fail", which isn't ideal. But "find_out" pairs perfectly with "fuck_around" and makes it clear that if you got there it's because something went wrong.
  I also like "yeet". Partly it's fun for comedic value. But, it's also good because "throw" feels like a casual game of catch in the park. "Yeet" feels more like it's out of control, if you hit a "throw" your code isn't carefully handing off its state, it's hitting the eject button and hoping for the best. You hope there's an exception handler higher up the stack that will do the right thing, but it also might just bubble all the way up to the top and spit out a nasty exception for the user.
- The whole thing was pretty damn good all the way through. The only thing that had me wondering was
  
  Tea
  Until it got to
  
  SpillTea
  Well played.
  
  NGL, that helped me actually understand the original function. It's been over a decade since I've touched anything related to C.
  
  the suspense!
  
  Indeed. I was unfair of me to pick only one favourite, as there are more candidates :)
- As well as the yeet keyword, I'm really friggin' diggin' this. [modernisation required]
  
  #define yeet throw #define let const auto #define mut & #define skibidi exit(1)
  The future is now!
  
  Oh yes, this one too of course!
- just what you want from code !
  
  Exactly!

I've seen forms of this joke quite a lot in the last few years, and it never fails to make me laugh.

It's so painfully good.

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

i hate it so fucking much
- I fucking love it. Gen Z slang is so lighthearted and fun.
  
  It's because we are depressed nihilists who have given up on pretty much everything, running on gallows homour to a point where we are meming youth slang. Don't worry, we're fine haha... Ha...

This was by far the best way to explain current slang.
I got all of it No Tea

And a decade or so ago it was LOLCODE that had me mildly concerned for the wellbeing of my peers.
- HAI 1.2 CAN HAS STDIO? IM IN YR LOOP UPPIN YR VAR TIL BOTH SAEM VAR AN 10 VISIBLE SUM OF VAR AN 1 IM OUTTA YR LOOP KTHXBYE
  A perfectly reasonable language. None of this Gen Z rubbish.
  Something something better times. Shakes stick at sky.
  
  Kids today just don't know real code
- For some reason, this just sparked an ancient memory of the Geek Code, which was a sort of signature block you could append to your emails and online bios to show off how much of a geek you were in the geekiest fashion possible.
  Goddamn I'm old.
  
  Wow, hadn't thought of that thing in ages. Now all we need is for B1FF to bring back ASCII sword signatures.
  
  Remember it spawning a bunch of copycats? For a while every community had their own code block. I wrote one for a usenet group i was in at the time.
  alt.sysadmin and alt.sysadmin.recovery both had em iirc...

That's way better than my emoji based programming language.
- I’m not so sure. Send a link.
  
  Haven't published it yet.
  Here are comparisons:
  ⚖️
  🐲
  🐲⚖️
  ⚖️🐲
  🚫🐲⚖️

Ah, yes. A private method for working on a public field.
- Ah but maybe the vibe is a lowkey period we can't be sure

For programmers who need action (cross-generational):
https://lhartikk.github.io/ArnoldC/
- 😂

@sjmarf And now someone is preparing a PR on C#’s GitHub issues… well done, well done.

Now I wanna see this in jive

Too many capital letters in the gen z version.
- That's what we Do.

play_stupid_games { // ... } win_stupid_prizes(thePrize) { // ... }
- FAFO block passes better
- I always thought it was "prizes"
  
  It is.
  
  Have you seen eggs lately, though?
  
  Thx and sorry. My spelling skills are bad.

ratios I need this and I'm an elder millenial
- Ratio is when your comment receives less upvotes than my reply, you get ratioed.
  
  I know! (Jumpin' Jehosaphat!, I'm no boomer!) 🤭

I'd take that yeet instead of return...
- So you like rust https://doc.rust-lang.org/beta/unstable-book/language-features/yeet-expr.html
  
  This is a better argument to adopt Rust than memory safety or even sane package management.

Just needs a rap about the fun in functions performed by 60-year-old seniors

slowly steps back and returns to basic and z80 assembly
- *Gen Z assembly
  
  *z18 assembly

Well. I think I'm officially out of touch with the newest generations slang terms. I only understood about half of that.
- I have many gray hairs, but here's what I know.
  Highkey and lowkey - obvious and subtle.
  fax is "facts" - true. Often in the sense of agreement.
  Fuck around and find out - do something risky and reap the consequences
  It's giving - how it makes you feel, or what it reminds you of.
  Cap and no cap - lying and telling the truth.
  Big yikes - bad, especially cringey.
  Tea - (n) gossip. (v) "spill the tea"
  Shoutout - give credit to someone. I don't think this one makes much sense here.
  Yap - talk, especially too much or unnecessarily.
  Yeet - throw, often without careful aim. (Unlike "Kobe", which is a throw with aim)
  
  You missed
  Rizz = charisma
  vibe check = Vibe is kinda like someone’s aura or energy. So to check their vibe is to call them out on it.
  Also got many grey hairs but I like to know what people mean and language evolves. Our generation did it too you get me blud.

Shoutout.SpillTea🤣

Conflating us again with iPad kids?
- Just wait till they get Lemmy on their iPads

I don’t get the joke. Is the one on the left actually valid C# code?
- C# is basically Java and from what I can tell, this looks approximately valid.
  Variables can always* be named freely to your liking.
  *You used to have to stick to the Latin alphabet, but that’s increasingly not the case anymore. Emoji-named variables FTW!
  
  It looks valid but vibe isn’t declared anywhere so it won’t compile.
  
  No it’s not “basically Java”
  Aside from how Microsoft stole it, fucked the standard library, fucked the naming conventions, etc. You would never just “throw” without specifying what you were throwing.

ruby if matz wete brainror

Why does the bool have brackets? I haven't really used c#, seems odd
- It's a method definition. C#'s standard formatting puts the left ~~bracket~~ brace of the method body on a new line. It's equivalent to:
  csharp
  
  private bool IsSus(){ ... }
  
  Ahhh, that makes way more sense. Thanks

106 comments