Finally! Someone with over 1000 hours in a game. I think I have over 3000 hours in Stellaris alone. Granted I've definitely walked away from that game in the endgame for over an hour and come back with practically nothing changing. It's a very slow game.
Play smaller and taller. Playing a wide game is tougher but not impossible. Also don't do what I do, do not have a custom built species for every origin. There's a lot of origins now and it's a little cluttered. Just build a race you like and get playing.