I am well on my way to this... less about insurance and more about the only dentist i ever had my entire life retired 5 years ago. He was a family friend and great. I'm still not sure how to get another one and also be great.
Look for an office that advertises "pain-free dentistry". Not because they're willing to drug you up if need be, but because that willingness also translates into more attentive and caring providers generally